As I was reading through Isaiah, a devotional in my Bible titled "Letting Go" caught my eye. As I read this short story on parents "letting go" of their children as they get older, I thought of how we as adult children have to let go of our parents as they get older also. As Christians, God has asked us to let go of everything in our lives that would keep us from worshiping Him whole heartily. That could be our children, our parents, our spouse, the love of money, the love of worldly things...anything that takes our focus off of Him.
Last April, God not only asked me to literally let go of my mother, but now He is asking me to let go of the grief that has had hold of me for the past 9 months. One of my best friends says that sometimes "God whispers" to us and I believe that He whispered to me the other day. I heard Him say very clearly "get up and let's go"...the weird thing is that I knew exactly what He was talking about. At that moment I said "ok Lord, let's go" and I walked away. Now don't misunderstand me...I haven't stopped thinking about my mom. I haven't stopped crying when I feel sad that the world that I once knew with her will no longer be. I haven't stopped longing for her touch, her voice, her warm smile. I just no longer sleep till 10:30 or 11am. I no longer am paralyzed by the depression I was living in. I no longer stay locked inside my house not wanting to socialize with others. I have my life back and I'm moving on...creating a new way of life for myself and my family, taking small steps, each and every day.
Letting go is hard to do. Letting go means that you can't go back. Letting go means you have to move on. Letting go means you aren't in control any more. So many times the things we work so hard to control will never be in our control.
Although letting go of our children as they grow and become more independent is different from letting go of our parents, we must continue to be in a relationship with both. We as parents must first make decisions for our young children, then start to mentor and guide our young adults, as we become their friends in adulthood and hand complete control of their decisions over to them. It is also important to stay in relationship with our parents as we learn from their wisdom through past victories as well as past failures and allow them to support and encourage us as we parent our growing children. I lost part of my support system when my momma died, but as I walked close to her the past 20 years or so, she taught me how to be the loving, caring, and giving mom I am today. I pray that I can instill these great traits in my children as they walk closely with me.
